Monday, December 29, 2008

EEEEP.



Yes. That is lovely sir Levi posting an "x" on my profile, on his own accord.
And what a lovely "x" it is. He acknowledges my existence.
I must act cool.
HAHA. I shall not scream.
Its embarrassing.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

Levi Beamish

Come to my arms, my beamish boy.
http://www.youtube.com/levibeamish
http://www.youtube.com/corporalcadet







I have such an embarrassingly huge crush on Levi Beamish right now.
He's so special.
And I love his name.
Gosh. I always crush on cute youtube celebrities and then stalk them.
I...

Am such a loser.

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Hahahaha

Dauzz ... says: wad time u sleeping?

Owl Girl` says: i dunno
Owl Girl` says: maybe soon

Dauzz ... says: wanna sleep with me?
Dauzz ... says: HAHAHAHAHAH

Owl Girl` says: o.0
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHAHAHHAHHA
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Dauzz ... says: dun laugh
Dauzz ... says: answer like a civilised person
Dauzz ... says: hahahahaah


Owl Girl` says: What time you sleeping?

Dauzz ... says: hahahahaah
Dauzz ... says: ard 230am
Dauzz ... says: still in ae


Owl Girl` says: LOL okay maybe
Owl Girl` says: If by 1am, I'm not tired
Owl Girl` says: then I'll sleep with you
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHAHAHHAA

Dauzz ... says: i'll be waitinggg
Dauzz ... says: in my boxers
Dauzz ... says: hahahahahaha


Owl Girl` says: HAHAHAHHA
Owl Girl` says: omgg
Owl Girl` says: maybe I should just go sleep now

Dauzz ... says: whyyyyyyyyyyy
Dauzz ... says: hahahahaha
Dauzz ... says: i havent get a chance to impress u with my pink bocers
Dauzz ... says: *boxers
Dauzz ... says: hahahahaha


Owl Girl` says: HAHAHA and how will that impress me??

Dauzz ... says: ALOT
Dauzz ... says: hahahaha
Dauzz ... says: u'll have to SEE it
Dauzz ... says: hahahahahahahaha


Owl Girl` says: I doubt so
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHa
Owl Girl` says: I think I will faint
Owl Girl` says: but not in wonder
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHAHA

Dauzz ... says: u will faint in my bed
Dauzz ... says: and then the FUN will start
Dauzz ... says: hahahaahhaah


Owl Girl` says: o.0
Owl Girl` says: OMG
Owl Girl` says: HAHAHA

LOL. *shakes head*
And all this comes from Firdaus the so called "holy" man.
Don't chat with him at night girls.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

Feliz Navidad


you're shining still behind the clouds,
saying i won't figure you out,
it might be true but let me say,
and try and try for the rest of my life,
i'm not scared of being alone,
i'm just happier being confused,

beside the fire as long as it's with you


Merry Christmas to everyone! How's it been for you guys?

I'm home today for christmas, and honestly it doesn't feel like such a warm holiday for me today. I spent the eve with family yesterday and tons of comfort food, shimmering christmas lights and cheesy christmas music. Today's kind of lonely, I don't know why. I love being home alone on holidays, honestly. But as I was watching corporalcadet on youtube dancing to some techno song I shook my head in amusement and thought to myself, "God, I'm such a loser." Seriously. I'm spending christmas watching staring at my computer screen watching cute guys doing lame techno dancing, some funny reruns of Ellen Degeneres, accompanied by a warm bowl of hearty miso soup. There's no agenda for me today, but perhaps a date with Haruki Murakami's "A Wild Sheep Chase" (which I got for christmas yesterday) and some depressing christmas movie on TV.

I'm perfectly fine being that much loserish though. I usually like it, if it makes sense. I mean if you know me well enough, you'd know I hate to stay out late past 10. My internal body clock strikes a non-existent curfew that makes me feel all worried and tinglish inside. I know. I suck. Also, I like doing things alone. I have shopped alone, watched movies alone, ate out alone. I don't like talking much, on msn as well, or on the phone or whatever. I've been appearing offline for the past few days, and if you do see me online and try to talk to me, most likely I won't reply you. And I'm sorry, hahaha. It's not your fault honestly, its just me. I'm socially phobic, and sometimes I just don't. Like. To. Talk. To. People.

Anyway point is. I'm here rambling because I'm feeling kind of forlorn. And. The skies are depressingly grey. I have a sniffly nose, and a half migraine whilst listening to semi depressing music. Right now its "Why Should The Fire Die" by Nickel Creek. (yes, its the song that I put on top of this entry. I just put it in. lol) For some reason I'm into some bluegrass music. For some unknown reason. I used to hate all the country shit, but I've always loved Irish music and bluegrass has that irish influence in it which makes everything sound so beautiful.

Ahhh. I just lost my point again. Never mind.

So, happy christmas everyone. Hope you all had a great time (:

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Starmile


It is Keren's 18th birthday today! Or should I say yesterday, because its like 1230am now already. Haha. Met up with Charis earlier to prepare all the balloons to scare Keren with. HAHA. Yes. Keren has a fear of balloons, now the whole world knows already ah. We took a long time to persuade her to hold that balloon and take a picture for us, you can't imagine. Hahahahha. Btw, Keren if you want to grab the pics please click on them for a larger view k. HAHA. Obviously I didn't make the pictures so small.


This is Charis being very upset because the balloon which she drew and decorated for Keren got ran over by a bus. HAHAHA. No joke, it really did happen.



Retarded.

Even more retarded.





The two girls I love very much (:


Anyway I'm like completely exhausted already, it was quite a fun day. We were walking around Dempsey Hill acting drunk, even though we didn't drink anything. We annoyed people with our laughter, annoyed the cab driver on the way home and annoyed each other the whole day. We're all awesome. Haha. I will blog more, but I'm soooo tired I swear.

HAPPY BIRD DAY THO KEREN. DON EAT FOOD HOE DAY. HAHA.

Happy holidays to everyone as well. Christmas eve already! So fast! Eep!

Monday, December 22, 2008

Argument on God


© Natasha Lim

"You're a Christian, aren't you, son?"
"Yes sir," the student says.
"So you believe in God?"
"Absolutely."
"Is God good?"
"Sure! God's good."
"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"
"Yes."
"Are you good or evil?"
"The Bible says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Aha! The Bible!" He considers for a moment. "Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help him? Would you try?"
"Yes sir, I would."
"So you're good...!"
"I wouldn't say that."
"But why not say that? You'd help a sick and maimed person if you could. Most of us would if we could. But God doesn't."
The student does not answer, so the professor continues. "He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Christian who died of cancer, even though he prayed to Jesus to heal him. How is this Jesus good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?"

The student remains silent.

"No, you can't, can you?" the professor says. He takes a sip of water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax.
"Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?"
"Er...yes," the student says.
"Is Satan good?"
The student doesn't hesitate on this one. "No."
"Then where does Satan come from?"
The student falters. "From...God..."
"That's right. God made Satan, didn't he? Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?"
"Yes, sir."
"Evil's everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything, correct?"
"Yes."
"So who created evil?" The professor continued, "If God created everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according to the principle that our works define who we are, then God is evil."
Again, the student has no answer. "Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things, do they exist in this world?"
The student squirms on his feet. "Yes."
"So who created them?"
The student does not answer again, so the professor repeats his question. "Who created them? There is still no answer. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace in front of the classroom. The class is mesmerized. "Tell me," he continues onto another student. "Do you believe in Jesus Christ, son?"
The student's voice betrays him and cracks. "Yes, professor, I do."

The old man stops pacing. "Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you ever seen Jesus?"
"No sir. I've never seen Him."
"Then tell us if you've ever heard your Jesus?"
"No, sir, I have not."
"Have you ever felt your Jesus, tasted your Jesus or smelt your Jesus? Have you ever had any sensory perception of Jesus Christ, or God for that matter?"
"No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't."
"Yet you still believe in him?"
"Yes."
"According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do you say to that, son?"
"Nothing," the student replies. "I only have my faith."
"Yes, faith," the professor repeats. "And that is the problem science has with God. There is no evidence, only faith."

The student stands quietly for a moment, before asking a question of his own. "Professor, is there such thing as heat?"
"Yes," the professor replies. "There's heat."
"And is there such a thing as cold?"
"Yes, son, there's cold too."
"No sir, there isn't."
The professor turns to face the student, obviously interested. The room suddenly becomes very quiet. The student begins to explain.
"You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat, unlimited heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat, but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit up to 458 degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold; otherwise we would be able to go colder than the lowest -458 degrees. Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-458 F) is the total absence of heat. You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it."

Silence across the room. A pen drops somewhere in the classroom, sounding like a hammer.

"What about darkness, professor. Is there such a thing as darkness?"
"Yes," the professor replies without hesitation. "What is night if it isn't darkness?"
"You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something; it is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light, but if you have no light constantly you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?"
The professor begins to smile at the student in front of him. This will be a good semester. "So what point are you making, young man?"
"Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with, and so your conclusion must also be flawed."
The professor's face cannot hide his surprise this time. Flawed? Can you explain how?"
"You are working on the premise of duality," the student explains. "You argue that there is life and then there's death; a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought." "It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it."

"Now tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?"
"If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man, yes, of course I do."
"Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?"
The professor begins to shake his head, still smiling, as he realizes where the argument is going. A very good semester, indeed.
"Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavour, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a preacher?"
The class is in uproar. The student remains silent until the commotion has subsided.
"To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student, let me give you an example of what I mean."
The student looks around the room. "Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's brain?" The class breaks out into laughter. "Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain, felt the professor's brain, touched or smelt the professor's brain? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain, with all due respect, sir. So if science says you have no brain, how can we trust your lectures, sir?"
Now the room is silent. The professor just stares at the student, his face unreadable.
Finally, after what seems an eternity, the old man answers. "I guess you'll have to take them on faith."
"Now, you accept that there is faith, and, in fact, faith exists with life," the student continues. "Now, sir, is there such a thing as evil?"

Now uncertain, the professor responds, "Of course, there is. We see it everyday. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil."
To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God.
God did not create evil. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."


The professor sat down.

The student's name was Albert Einstein

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Stains; Satin; Saints;


Eyes lined, cheeks flushed; satin skin. Artificial light.
Shy and sad, magic smile, magic butterflies.
Ink stains, you're my saint. We look good together,
dandy even less. Maybe not.
Honey, its too late; your water colour stains my white veil.
Video cameras and ice-cream dripping;
In air-conditioned malls. Honey. Only I slurped.
You didn't like me, and that was very clear.

© Natasha Lim

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Stay Golden



I tried, and I tried
To squeeze the blue out of the sky
The yellow out of the sun


Owl girl, cold water eyes.
Fill the past with friendly nights
Human skin, can be hard to live in
You'll feel better in the morning


Well, I've got music and hot chocolate by my side. My mood's pensive, my mind's tired and my heart's at peace. I'm contented and I feel one with the world. I think it's Seabear's doing. Seabear being currently the band I'm really into right now, with their incredibly dreamy vocals and tingling xylophonic sounds. Funny how initially after I heard I sing I swim from them, the image the lead singer's voice conveyed to me was a version of a band with very ugly cowboy looking men. Wasn't till 2 days ago when I decided to search them up on youtube and such, did I realise their bands not as bad looking at I thought they would be. Especially the lead singer. I have all but fell in love with his effortlessly haunting melancholic voice, and his dead pan stare. Gah.

There's the Catcher In The Rye waiting for me to read. Michael got it for me for my birthday, and I love how it smells. Sorry if that sounded kind of creepy, but I meant I love the new book smell. Don't you like the new book smell? I love the new book smell, and also the new car smell. And also the cool scent of ice. Haha. What is this.

Watched Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist with Keren today. Haha quite funny, and pretty sweet. I love Michael Cera. So cute and sensitive. I like cute and sensitive.

Hahahahahahha.

OKAY LA. I'm off to read.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

To Run



When was the last time you did something incredibly out of this world and crazy? Something completely out of your comfort zone and something that took the utmost guts to try. Watching Josiah Leming's story really got me thinking today. He really is such a precious person, I really think so. A precious boy with a precious talent and a precious heart. His desperate grip on his dream led him to quit school, leave home with nothing but a car and he started travelling, earning money on gigs whenever he can and living for a year in his own car. He came from nothing but like he said, he's suddenly part of his whole dream of being what be was truly meant to be.

I'm just wondering where my dreams took me. I had a dream, I did. I used to be so passionate with everything, just like Josiah. I wanted to do so many things. But unlike Josiah I sort of let it linger around a little then I pushed it back where it came from. I stopped nurturing it, I stopped thinking about it, I stopped chasing it because I thought it wasn't going to get me anywhere. I stopped chasing because I knew it was hard, because I knew I'd probably be turned down time and time again and I'd probably never get what I want in the end.

Makes me sad that I thought of it that way. But then again, there isn't any point in rambling about past crushed dreams is there? After all, time still exists. And today, I make an oath to try. To be like Josiah and to reach out to be what I really know I can be. Be it to start from nothing. I will try.

I hope everyone would too (:

Wade Johnston



I don't understand how someone can be so gorgeous, I swear.
He's so beautiful and so sweet and sensitive.
I mean come on, he has a pretty male voice, bright eyes, plays the ukelele, is kinda goofy in a really adorable way, and he's sensitive. Like he reads Catcher In the Rye and based that song on one of the quotes in the book.
He's like my ideal boyfriend. The kind you just want to hold hands with and to just talk to the whole day.
HAHA.

Aiya. Find me an asian version of this guy and I'll talk more.

Dont have only lor.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

18



This is how Logan destroyed my birthday invitation.


Lovely people who came. I had to make this into a collage because there's just too many pictures! The whole collection and more is on facebook though. And I'll be posting more of the others tomorrow or something, tired la now. LOL.


Happy birday to me.

Haha. It was a quite a lovely party, I love all those of you who came and for those who tried but couldn't make it, I love you all the same. I really thank God for having blessed me with good friends and for such a big family who loves me.

So throughout the day, I kept thinking like "Okay, I'm 18." And its like, got difference meh? LOL.

For the past 18 years of living, I haven't brought anyone to Christ. Haven't really evangelised, haven't brought a non-christian to church. I'm not sure if I've touched lives, or if I have made any impact or any sort of an impression on anyone I've met. I still haven't learned how to roller blade and how to ice skate. Haven't learned how to do a cartwheel. Haven't fulfilled my grandmother's wish of having me skinny... You know. There's just so many things I haven't done, mostly things for God that I keep neglecting and pushing away.

Having this party actually made me reflect on many things. Like, how lucky I am to have a huge extended family that cares so much as to take the day off to help with the preparation of my party. Having doting parents who are so generous with spending money on like 2 lambs, and organising a party for my 18th birthday. A lovely sensible little sister, who's so helpful and so endearing. Friends who are willing to stay till past midnight just to wish me Happy birthday at the right hour. And friends who loved me enough to come. Everything just made me feel so loved, you know? (:

So thank you! All of you. Every single one of you for coming, for helping, for everything!

Oh also. Kisses to Charis and Keren. For tricking me to come out of my house at 11pm and suprising me with the huge picture collage and the light stick mould of my name on the floor, even though I didnt catch that till the last minute. LOL. Mostly, for spending the last hour of my birthday with me. LOVE YOU BOTH LA.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Two Things

First of all...



My stomach wehhh pain ):

Second.




I hate Zhenzhu from Little Nyonya. I want to cook her in soup.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Today...



I fell in love with this song. What can I do? It's raining as per ushe, I've caught the cold and there are a million tissues surrounding me. There's homework but I will do it later because I love to procrastinate like that. And listening to this song reminds me of an old me, which I'm happy I grew out of.

Play me a sad song because
That's what I want to hear.
I want you to make me cry.
I want to remember the places that we left,
Lost to the mists of time.


Isn't the video just kind of forlorn? I mean, taking away the happy dancing and the happy beat, it is a sad song. Its a sad happy song, if that makes any sense.

Yeah (: