Cassie- Flyleaf

"Do you believe in God?"
Written on the bullet
Say yes to pull the trigger
"Do you believe in God?"
Written on the bullet
And Cassie pulled the trigger.

"Do you believe in God?"
Written on the bullet
Say yes to pull the trigger
Do you believe in God
Written on the bullet
And Rachel pulled the trigger



Cassie René Bernall (November 6, 1981 – April 20, 1999) was a student killed in the Columbine High School massacre, aged 17.
Initial reports suggested that one of the assailants, asked Bernall if she believed in God moments before fatally shooting her. She was reported to have answered "yes".This story led to Bernall being presented as a martyr by some Christians, and served as the inspiration for several songs, including Michael W. Smith's "This Is Your Time" and Flyleaf's "Cassie".


Rachel Joy Scott (August 5, 1981 - April 20, 1999) was the first victim of the Columbine High School massacre. At 11:19 a.m., a witness heard Eric Harris yell "Go! Go!" At that moment the gunmen pulled out their shotguns and began shooting at Rachel Scott and Richard Castaldo, who were sitting on a grassy knoll to their left (next to the West Entrance of the school), eating lunch. Scott was killed instantly, hit 4 times; Castaldo was critically wounded, hit 8 times.

Many rumors swirled regarding the causes of the rampage, including the possible targeting of Christians. One such rumor was that the shooters first asked Scott if she believed in God, then killed her after she answered "you know I do." This rumor has never been proven false or true. Richard Castaldo said at the hospital after the shooting that they mocked Rachel for her faith and then they killed her.

The Columbine High School massacre occurred on Tuesday, April 20, 1999, at Columbine High School in Columbine in unincorporated Jefferson County, Colorado, near Denver and Littleton. Two students, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, embarked on a shooting rampage, killing 12 students and a teacher, as well as wounding 23 others, before committing suicide.


I'm moved beyond words at their faith.
Say yes to pull the trigger.

Word Vomit

Not anymore

To be in a state of mixed forces, I smiled
Ruefully. Recounting stars counted on nights
Weeks before, months before. Remembering fuzzy
Feelings, entwined with melancholic beauty. Everything
That is in us, we want to hurt.

Welcoming pain, like welcoming happiness. Yearning
Forgetfulness, yearning comfort. We don't know what it
Is we want, but we want what is most apparent to us.
It is on days like this, I swing my legs across broken
Shards, recounting and recollecting. No longer sad,
But strickened with nostalgia brimming just over the cup
Of overflowing senses.

Its no more striving for what Eisley sings for, nor
pretty words bleeding upon a blank canvas. It is digging
Deep, clawing rawness and dryness within. No more
Simplicity, no more complexities, no more locked lips.
But more life, more humbleness, more happiness.
More of who we are.

We are not authentic, we are not unique.
We are loved, and we are broken.

-Natasha Lim ©

What I wrote on Xinyi's facebook

008009.

We rAwkZz

HAhahahaha.

Xinyi says: (6:59:41 PM)
when you said "but its just not the right time" it sounded like you were breaking up with me

Xinyi says: (6:59:46 PM)
HAHAHA

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (6:59:58 PM)
HAHAHHA

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:00:03 PM)
"its not you, its me"

Xinyi says: (7:00:12 PM)
why??

Xinyi says: (7:00:17 PM)
i refuse to accept this

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:00:30 PM)
you have to understand

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:00:36 PM)
its not that i want this

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:00:43 PM)
its just me you know.

Xinyi says: (7:00:47 PM)
NO!!!!!!

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:00:49 PM)
i dont know what I'm feeling now

Xinyi says: (7:00:56 PM)
THIS CANT BE TRUE!!!!!

Xinyi says: (7:01:06 PM)
*screaming and pulling hair*

Xinyi says: (7:01:11 PM)
HAHAHA

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:01:13 PM)
HAHAHAH

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:01:15 PM)
wah drama

Xinyi says: (7:01:21 PM)
HAHAHHA

Xinyi says: (7:01:24 PM)
SO FUNNY

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:02:04 PM)
YA LUH

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:02:08 PM)
So gonna put this on my blog

I was born a unicorn, I could've sworn you believed in me. says: (7:02:09 PM)
HAHAHAH

I'm facing some kind of a wall when it comes to doing the movie trailer for school. I feel like I've hit this wall, and I can't venture anywhere from it. I just keep hitting it, over and over again. Well, to simplify things I'm just horribly stucks. The ideas I've come up with sounds really difficult to produce, and if I were to go with it.. I'd need great help from the mighty Mr Jovi. HAHA.



I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. My dog pissed me off. HAHA. My sister let her into my room early this morning and left her, so my dog started whining cos she couldn't get out. And her whining woke me up, and although its 11 am already, I was still tired. LOL so I had to get out of bed. Then I sort of planted myself on a chair and stoned at the tv without blinking, and my dog decides to be playful and jumped on my lap, digging her paws into my thighs. I screamed at her, cos it was painful.

And she ran away to the far far corner of the room and looked up at me with guilty eyes. HAHA SO CUTE. She just wanted her morning pat on the head, and me being grumpy this morning had to suffer my wrath of fury. Then she sort of inched her way as close to me as possible, being careful not to touch me. Then stared up at me like "I'm sorry."

Awwwwww. So I gave her her morning pat on the head. And she was happy again. HAHA.

Crazy.

Oh anyway today's my sister's birthday party. Lots of 9/10 year olds running around. Omg. *shudders*

I like kids, but below the age of 9. When they start being 9 or 10, they become more influenced and knowing of the media and start to become poseurs.. At such a young age. It only happens in this generation I've noticed.

I was still playing with barbie dolls when I was 9.

Heck I'm still playing with barbie dolls even now la.

Oops.

Love at first sight

Bought it today at AMK Hub with twinsa mersa. Had an awesome catch up session, I think its true that God planned for us to talk today Mersa. It really made me feel much better about everything.. Not that I'm not okay with how things are going for me, but well talking to you really made me feel even better than how I was feeling (: We gotta do these things often!

Anyway, after eating we were just walking around for fun, looking for shoes. And I saw this pair of hot pink round toe patent stilettos (not the one in the picture), and I fell in love at first sight with it. I knew it was gonna be great when I tried it on, and it really was awesome. But they told me they ran out of all other sizes except for size 35. So I'm like AHHHHHHHH. WHYYYY. And I got all depressed. HAHA.

But after walking around for a while, I saw that pair in the pictures. But I didn't really want that one, because I was looking for a ROUND toe hot pink stiletto. After much thought and persuasion from Mersa, I tried it on and it looked just as nice as that pair I wanted. And it was surprisingly comfy! And it was on discount! SO I BOUGHT IT. HAHA.

Wheeee. I'm so happy now. :D

For a pessimist, I'm pretty optimistic.

It really is a choice to be happy. You can choose to be sad and constantly remind yourself of why you're sad, and keep on dwelling on the things that make you sad, then tell people "Its not that I want to be sad, but I just can't help it." Or you can take time to think and understand your plight, then concentrate on the good side and extract the bad out. Then look around you and appreciate the simple things that make you feel warm and loved. (:

I wish I was a hippie so I could spread love to this world and make everyone happy.

Meet my new pet

adopt your own virtual pet!

BE AFRAID. BE VERYYYY AFRAID.

[from pushing daisies]

Ned: Everything we do is a choice. Oatmeal or cereal. Highway or side streets. Kiss her or keep her. We make choices and we live with the consequences. If someone gets hurt along the way we ask for forgiveness. It’s the best anyone can do.

Olive: Wouldn't it just rock and roll if liking someone meant they had to like you back? Of course that'd be a different universe and something else would probably suck.

Olive: Oh, isn't it great we can joke? Now that we that we know that there's nothing going on between us and never was. It can be funny. I bet this sort of thing happens all the time between adults. Mixed romantic messages. In no time we'll be looking back and laugh until we wet the rug. Which we'll then want to shampoo. Couple times. Possibly three, depending on what we were drinking.

I can't express how much I love this show. I recently rewatched Episode 2 of Pushing Daisies just for fun. And there was one part where I absolutely adored. It goes something like,

Narrator: "The scientist was kind. The scientist was learned. He told Jeanine of his hobbies of catching butterflies, and when he told her how he always set them free in the end, she went dizzy and giggled for no apparent reason."

"Bernard remembered her hair Redder, her sweater tighter and her smile, ... well her smile he remembered just right."

That was such an AWWW moment. AHH.

Current playlist of the moment.

Float on- Ben Lee
Lloyd, I'm ready to be heartbrokened- Camera Obscura
Lovefool- The Cardigans
Patins- CSS
Artbitch- CSS
Fuckoff is not the only thing you have to show- CSS
Cue the Sun- Daphne loves Derby
Come see the duck- Deerhoof
Trolley Wood- Eisley
Come as you are- Emilie Simon
Business Time- Flight of the Conchords <3<3<3
Headlock- Imogen Heap
My idea of heaven- Leigh Nash
The world at large- Modest Mouse
Ice Cream- New Young Pony Club
Smells like Teen Spirit- Nirvana
Slippery dick- Peaches
Someday- The Strokes

Its a new start. Happy songs= Happy positive energy= All round happier me. (:

At least I'm trying!

Charis' 18th Birthday Celebration

Celebrated Charis' 18th today, with a picnic at Pasir Ris Beach. Keren and I prepared all the food, baked 18 cupcakes and decorated them individually and I brought along my mother's home made strawberry wine for the picnic. Bought rose petals and had them strewn all across the table, along with candles as the centerpiece. Made everything feel so pretty! (: Keren's friend Jake came along and we waited for Charis for like 3 hours, but it was okay. Although the food was kinda like melting. HAHA. But since she was the birthday girl, she's allowed to be fashionably late. So on with the pictures!

The Table







Some shots of the cupcakes




Fooooooood!!!
I made Shepherd's Pie, potato salad and finger sandwiches shaped like stars. HAHA. Keren made sausages and soup.






My Mama's strawberry wine. OH SO DAMN GOOD.





Keren and I. Whats with the smile keren. HAHA.



Me: "This is so romantic, I'm in a park eating a STRAWBERRY. IN THE MORNING. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!"
Keren: "Yeah and plus! YOU'RE WITH ME!!"
Me: ......



Keren looks good next to candles, apparently.




We ate strawberries whilst waiting for the arrival of Charis the great.



And then finally she came.



So we finally started eating and tricked Charis that we'll do the proper cut-cake thing after lunch. We made another cake, piled with whipped cream on top, and after singing the birthday song... Smashed the cake into Charis' face. WHOO. HAHA. (following pics are screenshots of the video. Yes. It is being recorded, and I'm too embarrassed to upload it here. So pictures will suffice. LOL.)





Charis then tried to grab me.



Then I tried to grab Keren.



Which was successful. LOL



And Keren got Jake.



We ended the day by making a trip to the airport. Our very coolxzxz hang0uTz. Watched the planes flew by whilst drinking starbucks, and entertained ourselves by reading each other's love lives countless times. And talking about relationships and stupid boys. HAHA. FUN.

Happy birthday to my craziest, funniest, noisiest, most spontaneous, mop-like duduhead CHARIS. HAHA. You're like damn old now, because you're 18, but I don't care. Age doesn't matter to me, I'll still love you all the same. Although you like to laugh at me and Keren's misery, we still love you too. HAHA. Thanks for the joy, fun, laughter you have brought into our lives and the countless times you've stood by us in our darkest hours. We'll spend the rest of our lives being the bestest best friends foreverxzxzxz. yAy. HAHA. Mwah mwah mwah.

Charlie the unicorn

CHARLIE IS THE BANANA KING.

AHA! HAHAHA! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!! AHHHHHHHHH.

DAMN RETARDED.

Today I awoke to skies that were grey to match my heart.

Everything is alright

Scream. Shout.
No more reasons. No more explanations.
I understand now, I really do.
Vicious cycles of stupidity.
A revolving vague sense of blankness
We're both alone
And we're both assholes.
Blow out the candles.
Blow out dreams.
Blow out wishes.
Nothing's left.
It all disappeared like smoke.

I feel like a whore today.

Pushing Daisies

Ned: You're the only one for me.
Chuck: I know you feel that now, but there are things you want, there's things we both want.
Ned: So? Everyone wants stuff. We wake up everyday with a list of wishes a mile long and maybe we spend our lives trying to make those wishes come true, but just because we want them doesn't mean we need them to be happy.
Chuck: What do you need to be happy?
Ned: You.


Awwwww...... (:

I'm currently hooked on Pushing Daisies. Adorable quirky little show, it kind of makes me very happy. Lee Pace is so cute in it, character-wise. The way he's so geeky and shy and scared is so endearing. Everyone should watch this show, its awesome. Better than Gossip Girls :X HAHA.

I have lots of work to do today, so I'm going to watch one more episode of Pushing Daisies, slack around a while. Then start work. I shall keep myself occupied today. Toodles.

Sick of everything.

Thanks for taking the liberty to reply.

Not that it makes me feel any better.

I was just wondering what is it that makes everyone unique. No one is truly unique. I'm not anymore unique than anyone who lives in my neighbourhood. We want to be unique, so much that we've lost sight of who we really are, just to try to fit into somewhere in this world. We all march around to this anthem of "being different" to "stand out from the crowd". But all I see are people wearing the same clothes, speaking the same words and acting the same way. So who are they truly trying not to be like?

To me, trying to be different is just giving yourself a place in this world that you don't really deserve. Isn't what is important is to stay true to who you are, no matter what you're like? Because no matter how much you try, you're just human beings trying to make it in this world. Live and be happy, be who you are.

Because someone in this world loves you for who you are, and thats what makes you special.

Ailleurs

Réécrire notre histoire, to rewrite our history.

Awww... So pretty, so lovely. Kind of makes me very happy (:

What I'm really longing for now is for lovely blue skies and gentle breezes, going down to a park with a strawberry ice-cream cone in one hand, sunglasses perched in the other. Laughing and skipping, feeling like I'm floating in this atmosphere so light and pretty. I want to dance with the wind, feeling like a windchime, and feeling special and sparkling. Ice-cream dripping down my hand, the smell of grass, the tangles in my hair.

Ahhhhh. Its like an intimate treat for the soul, so therapeutic. I don't mind being alone (:

PART TWO

YAY DONE UPLOADING. Had awesome fun with you two, love you both too much (:

Btw my photoblog is DONE. http://violetstencils.blogspot.com

ENJOY.